Sleep Training Your Baby: When, How, and Tips
Sleep training is the process of teaching your baby to fall asleep independently and return to sleep on their own. This helps both baby and parents get more restful, predictable nights.
When I first became a mom, I remember sitting in the nursery during the second week, barely getting any sleep, staring at my tiny newborn and wondering, “Do I even think about training a baby to sleep?”
I mean, this little human is brand new to the world, figuring out everything from blinking to breathing to how to feed, and here I am wondering about schedules and routines! It felt almost impossible to imagine that sleep training could even exist.
But it does. And the more I learned, the more I realized that there’s a proper way to do it. Knowing when to start, which methods to try, and how to help a baby adjust.
Sleep training isn’t about being strict or unkind. It’s about helping your baby (and yourself!) get the rest you both need. Here’s what you should know.
What is Sleep Training?
Sleep training is all about helping your baby learn how to fall asleep on their own at bedtime (and even get back to sleep if they wake up during the night) without needing you right there every time. It doesn’t mean your baby will magically sleep through the night (1).
Just like adults, babies naturally wake up as they move through different sleep stages. The goal is to give them the tools to soothe themselves and feel secure enough to drift back to sleep.
Sleep training benefits babies by:
- Encouraging self-soothing and independence
- Establishing a predictable and consistent sleep routine
- Improving the quality and length of their sleep
- Supporting healthy growth and brain development
It also benefits parents by:
- Allowing for longer stretches of uninterrupted rest
- Reducing stress and exhaustion from nighttime awakenings
- Helping create a calmer, more predictable household routine
- Promoting family well-being
When babies learn to sleep more independently, everyone in the family benefits. Nights become calmer, days feel less exhausting, and the household can enjoy a sense of rhythm and predictability.
When to Start Sleep Training Your Baby?
Most babies are ready for sleep training between 4 to 6 months old. Around this age, their circadian rhythm (the internal body clock that regulates sleep and wake cycles) starts to mature (2). This helps them recognize the difference between day and night and allows for longer stretches of uninterrupted sleep.
Babies in this stage also begin developing self-soothing skills, such as sucking on their hands, turning their head to get comfortable, or finding a cozy position in their crib. These small signs show that they’re learning how to settle themselves when they wake up during the night.
It’s important to remember that newborns (under 4 months old) are not ready for sleep training. Their bodies and feeding patterns are still developing, and they rely on frequent comfort and closeness from their parents to feel safe and secure.
As your baby grows, notice if they start falling asleep on their own at night or settling back down after waking. These are signs that your baby might be ready to start learning more independent sleep habits.
Before starting sleep training, always check with your pediatrician. They can help you decide if your baby is developmentally ready and recommend the best approach for your family.
Sleep Training Methods
Once you’ve decided that your baby is ready, the next step is to explore the different ways to approach sleep training. It helps to understand how each method works and what it involves.
Below are some of the most common sleep training methods parents use:
Cry-it-out method (CIO)
Also known as the “extinction method,” this approach was popularized by pediatrician Dr. Richard Ferber, though his actual method (the Ferber method) is a gentler version of CIO. The idea behind CIO is to let your baby cry for a set period without comforting them, allowing them to learn how to fall asleep independently.
How it works:
- After your bedtime routine, put your baby in their crib while they’re still awake.
- Say goodnight and leave the room.
- If your baby cries, you don’t go back in. Over time, they learn to soothe themselves and fall asleep without intervention.
CIO method may be best for parents who are comfortable with limited involvement and want a straightforward approach.
Ferber method
Created by Dr. Richard Ferber, this method is also known as “graduated extinction” or “progressive waiting.” It’s similar to the CIO method but allows parents to check in at timed intervals.
How it works:
- Place your baby in their crib while they’re awake.
- If they cry, wait a short period (for example, 3 minutes) before going in briefly to reassure them without picking them up. You can softly say soothing words, like “I’m here, it’s bedtime,” so they know your voice is nearby and that you are supporting them.
- Each night, gradually increase the waiting time before checking in.
Ferber method may be best for parents who prefer a structured plan that still involves comforting their baby at intervals but want to encourage self-soothing over time.
Chair method
The chair method gets its name from the central role of a chair in helping your baby learn to fall asleep independently. The basic idea is simple: you start by sitting in a chair next to your baby’s crib while they fall asleep. It offers comfort and reassurance without picking them up.
Over time, you gradually increase the distance between you and your baby until you’re eventually out of the room, so they can adjust to sleeping on their own at a pace that feels manageable.
How it works:
- Start close. Place a chair right next to your baby’s crib. Sit there while they settle down and fall asleep.
- Every few nights, move the chair slightly farther from the crib — just a small step at a time.
- Continue this process until your chair is outside the room and your baby can fall asleep without you being in the room.
Chair method may be best for parents who want to provide continuous presence while helping their baby learn to fall asleep independently at a slower pace.
Pick up, put down method
Popularized by Tracy Hogg, author of The Baby Whisperer, this approach involves comforting your baby when they cry while still encouraging them to fall asleep in their crib.
Unlike methods that involve letting your baby cry without intervention, this technique allows you to respond to their needs. The goal is to provide security and guidance without creating a dependence on being held to sleep.
How it works:
- When your baby cries, pick them up to comfort them until they’re calm but not asleep.
- Once calm, gently place them back in the crib.
- Repeat as needed until your baby falls asleep on their own.
Pick up, put down method may be best for parents who want an interactive, responsive approach and don’t mind spending more time during the process. It’s especially suitable for younger babies or sensitive infants who need more reassurance.
Fading method
The Fading Method, sometimes called “camping out,” is a gradual approach to sleep training that focuses on helping your baby or child fall asleep independently without you suddenly leaving your child’s room.
With this method, parents stay in the room while their child drifts off, offering quiet reassurance and a steady presence. You might stand nearby or sit in a chair next to their bed.
The key idea is to fade your presence slowly over time. You still provide comfort, but with less physical or verbal involvement each night.
How it works:
- After your usual bedtime routine, place your baby in bed while they’re drowsy but awake.
- Sit or stand close by as they fall asleep. Offer reassurance if needed.
- Over the next several nights, move a little farther from their crib or bed. You might go from sitting beside them to sitting in the middle of the room, then by the door, and finally outside the room.
Fading method may be best for parents who want to stay present during the sleep training process but prefer a slower, more gradual approach. This method can take longer (sometimes up to two weeks).
Tips for Sleep Training Your Baby
Every parent’s journey through sleep training looks a little different. What works beautifully for one family might not fit another, and that’s completely okay. I’d like to share these strategies that may help guide you and your baby through the process.
Ensure that your baby’s needs are met
Before you begin sleep training, make sure your baby’s basic needs are taken care of. A full belly, a clean diaper, and comfortable sleepwear go a long way in helping your baby relax.
Babies who are overtired or uncomfortable will find it harder to settle down, so always start with a calm, well-fed baby.
Establish a consistent bedtime routine
Consistency builds comfort. A short, predictable routine (like a warm bath, a gentle massage, soft lullabies, and dimming the lights) signals to your baby that it’s time to sleep. Following the same steps each night helps their body and brain recognize bedtime, which makes falling asleep smoother over time.
Avoid overstimulating the baby before bedtime
Playtime and excitement are wonderful, but right before sleep, they can make it harder for your baby to wind down. Try to keep the environment calm and quiet in the hour before bed. Turn off bright lights, lower any noise, and replace stimulating play with soothing activities like reading or quiet cuddles.
Lay your baby down drowsy, but awake
This simple but powerful tip teaches your baby how to fall asleep independently. When you put your baby down while they’re sleepy (but not yet asleep) they begin to associate their crib or bed with falling asleep, not just being asleep. It might take practice, but it’s an effective step toward healthy sleep habits.
Allow your baby to adjust and learn the process
Learning to sleep independently takes time. Just like learning to crawl or walk, your baby needs practice, and patience from you. Expect some resistance or fussing in the beginning, but stay consistent.
Not every method will work
Some may respond well to one sleep training approach, while others might need something gentler or more flexible. If one method isn’t working, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It just means your baby needs a different strategy.
Personally, what worked for me was a combination of the Pick Up, Put Down method and a bit of the Fading method. In the real world, sleep training is rarely black and white. The key is to stay patient, observe what your baby responds to, and adjust as needed. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Pros and Cons of Sleep Training
Sleep training can be incredibly beneficial, but it’s important to approach it with realistic expectations and self-compassion.
On the positive side, sleep training helps babies develop self-soothing skills, which can lead to longer, more restful stretches of sleep. This benefits both the baby and the parents, as it allows everyone to function better during the day.
At the same time, there are challenges to consider. One of the hardest parts for many parents is hearing their baby cry from another room. Even knowing that it’s part of the process, it can feel upsetting and stressful, and it’s normal to worry or feel guilty.
Additionally, sleep training doesn’t always work the first time. Some methods may take longer to be effective, and babies may need time to adjust.
These challenges don’t mean you’re doing anything wrong — they’re a natural part of helping your baby learn new skills.
The Takeaway
Sleep training is about helping your little one build healthy sleep habits while also giving yourself a chance to rest and recharge. Every baby is unique, and every family’s situation is different, so flexibility, patience, and self-compassion are key.
Time, patience, and thoughtful care can lead to more calmer nights and restful days.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the best age to sleep train a baby?
Most experts recommend starting sleep training between 4 to 6 months old, when babies’ circadian rhythms are developing and they are beginning to learn self-soothing skills. Newborns under 4 months are not ready, as they still need frequent feeding and comfort.
How long does sleep training take to work?
The timeline varies depending on the method, your baby’s temperament, and consistency. Some babies may adjust in a few days, while others may take up to two weeks or longer.
What if my baby keeps crying or won’t settle?
Crying is normal as your baby adjusts to new sleep routines. Ensure your baby’s needs (like hunger, diaper changes, and comfort) are met first. If crying continues beyond what feels safe or manageable, pause and try again later, or try a different method.
Can I sleep train while breastfeeding?
Yes, but it requires some flexibility. Many breastfeeding babies may still wake for night feeds. Sleep training can focus on helping your baby fall asleep independently rather than eliminating all nighttime feeding. Gradual approaches may work well for breastfeeding families.
Sources:
- Holliday-Bell, A., MD. (n.d.). A parent’s guide to sleep training infants and toddlers. UChicago Medicine. https://www.uchicagomedicine.org/forefront/pediatrics-articles/sleep-training-in-infants-and-toddlers
- Suni, E. (2025, July 21). Sleep training for babies. Sleep Foundation. https://www.sleepfoundation.org/baby-sleep/sleep-training